Turkeys Quotes

• May your stuffing be tasty May your turkey plump, May your potatoes and gravy Have nary a lump. May your yams be delicious And your pies take the prize, And may your Thanksgiving dinner Stay off your thighs!

  Grandpa Jones

  Thanksgiving, Yams, Pie

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• Most people don't realize turkeys are friendly, they're social, they're loyal, they have emotions.

  Shannon Elizabeth

  People, Friendly, Loyal

  "Thanksgiving Q&A: Shannon Elizabeth’s New Tradition — Adopt A Turkey!". Interview with Christopher Locke, www.accesshollywood.com. November 21, 2012.

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• No more turkey, but I'd like some more of the bread it ate.

  Hank Ketcham

  Bread

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• T hanks for time to be together, turkey, talk, and tangy weather.
  H for harvest stored away, home, and hearth, and holiday.
  A for autumn's frosty art, and abundance in the heart.
  N for neighbors, and November, nice things, new things to remember.
  K for kitchen, kettles' croon, kith and kin expected soon.
  S for sizzles, sights, and sounds, and something special that about.
  That spells THANKS for joy in living and a jolly good Thanksgiving.

  Aileen Fisher

  Art, Nice, Home

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• Radical historians now the tell the story of Thanksgiving from the point of view of the turkey.

  Mason Cooley

  Views, History, Stories

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• If you associate with turkeys, you will never fly with the eagles.

  Brian Tracy

  Eagles, Associates, Ifs

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• The best way to thaw a frozen turkey? Blow in it's ear.

  Johnny Carson

  Blow, Frozen, Ears

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• If you want to soar like an eagle in life, you can't be flocking with the turkeys.

  Warren Buffett

  Eagles, Want, Soar

  "7 Powerful Leadership Lessons From Warren Buffett" by Travis Wright, www.businessinsider.com. November 11, 2014.

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• Don't assume you're always going to be understood. I wrote in a column that one should put a cup of liquid in the cavity of a turkey when roasting it. Someone wrote me that 'the turkey tasted great, but the plastic cup melted.

  Heloise

  Cups, Liquid, Assuming

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• The turkey's eyes are such that he can see a bumblebee turn a somersault on the verge of the horizon.

  Archibald Rutledge

  Eye, Hunting, Horizon

  Archibald Rutledge, James A. Casada (1994). “America's Greatest Game Bird: Archibald Rutledge's Turkey Hunting Tales”, p.9, Univ of South Carolina Press

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• Europe will get a stable and prosperous Turkey.

  Olli Rehn

  Europe, Stable, Prosperous

  "Sweet and sour climax to Turkey's long march" by Nicholas Watt, Helena Smith, www.theguardian.com. October 3, 2005.

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• We're all turkeys! Some of us are running around with our heads cut off, some of us are flapping our wings that hard we're close to flying. But nothing is an eagle bar God.

  Phil Collins

  Running, Cutting, Eagles

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• A turkey is more occult and awful than all the angels and archangels. In so far as God has partly revealed to us an angelic world, he has partly told us what an angel means. But God has never told us what a turkey means. And if you go and stare at a live turkey for an hour or two, you will find by the end of it that the enigma has rather increased than diminished.

  Gilbert K. Chesterton

  Mean, Angel, Two

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• Thanksgiving is the day when you turn to another family member and say, 'How long has Mom been drinking like this?' My Mom, after six Bloody Marys looks at the turkey and goes, 'Here, kitty, kitty.'

  David Letterman

  Thanksgiving, Mom, Drinking

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• Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving.

  W. T. Purkiser

  Thanksgiving, Thank You, Gratitude

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• I hate turkeys. If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad at turkeys. There's turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami. Some one needs to tell the turkey, 'man, just be yourself.'

  Mitch Hedberg

  Thanksgiving, Being Yourself, Fun

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• An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.

  Irv Kupcinet

  Thanksgiving, Optimistic, Optimism

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• Turkey: A large bird whose flesh, when eaten on certain religious anniversaries has the peculiar property of attesting piety and gratitude.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Thanksgiving, Gratitude, Religious

  Ambrose Bierce (2016). “The Devil's Dictionary: The Devil World”, p.226, 谷月社

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• The pilgrims were kicked out of England, quarreled with the Dutch, alienated the Indians, and had an evil reputation among the turkeys.

  Dave Beard

  Usa, Evil, Dutch

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• Turkeys are peacocks that have really let themselves go.

  Kristen Schaal

  Funny, Humor, Peacock

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• When turkeys mate they think of swans.

  Johnny Carson

  Funny Love, Drinking, Inspiration

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• The only thing I could think of was turkey neck and turkey gizzards and I felt very depressed.

  Sylvia Plath

  Thinking, Necks, Bell Jar

  Sylvia Plath (2016). “The Bell Jar”, p.36, Hamilton Books

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• If you want to save a species, simply decide to eat it. Then it will be managed - like chickens, like turkeys, like deer, like Canadian geese.

  Ted Nugent

  Funny Thanksgiving, Want, Deer

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• I love Thanksgiving turkey... It's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.

  Arnold Schwarzenegger

  Thanksgiving, Los Angeles, Natural

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• Thanksgiving day. Let us all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks now, but the turkeys.

  Mark Twain

  Humble, Giving, Thanks

  Pudd'nhead Wilson ch. 18, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar" (1894)

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