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Like.Share.Follow. (2017)
Poor writing
I enjoyed the first 3 quarters or maybe even more. Yes a bit slow, but actually fine.
Acting not too bad
I mean, yes, u need to put reality to the side, but u need to do that for a lot of movies. Otherwise common sense would prevail and theyd be over in 20mins.
However. There is a limit. The poor writing comes in with his best male friend. How he acted in the end was ridiculous and so unbelievable.
Maybe ok leaving ur friend for the car. But then getting on ur knees and let this girl come towards u with only an axe. Really? Run back into the house, charge her? Run away? No, just get down and give up. No, sorry cant stretch that far.
The final fight. In reality that would last 30 seconds with him vs her, even with an axe she was hopeless at using.
And then the misery ending. Please.
Anyway, as with most movies these days, goot start and terrible end.
No Way Up (2024)
A really good watch
Check my other reviews, this is not fake. I really enjoyed this. Yes you might have to put your brain surgeon intellect beside, but it is what it is
Acting in the main was very good. Shed a little tear at some points. You need to go in knowing what it is, a plane going into the sea with sharks. If you expect the godfather level of storyline, get over it.
Put yourself in these characters shoes and go with it.
Yes an annoying character or two, but they come good.
Those talking about the science. Bore off.
If you want a movie that keeps you hooked and thinking what the h would i do? Then go for it.
Leave the World Behind (2023)
Sorry, not sorry, but a 1
Wow. This movie was so intense. I was hooked from minute 15 onwards
The advertising was great
Julia roberts - great
Ethan hawke, kevin bacon etc - great
I seriously was so taken in and went with it
Then, it ended. Like, seriously, who the, you know what, allows these movies to go out? There was no end. You get so involved and then shaft the audience with ridiculousness. I would have given this movie 10 if it had even just a half decent ending, cause i could live with a half decent ending after an amazing movie
But no
And yes, i get the point of the girl couldnt watch the last episode of friends, so it's like we should all feel like that
No. We are meant to enjoy a movie and talk good about it.
So annoyed.
Dangerous Game: The Legacy Murders (2022)
Please save yourself from this
If you are considering watching this, please stop and throw yourself down the stairs instead.
Awful. Like, not even funny awful. Just awful. The acting just gets worse as the movie goes on. Storyline is non-sensical.
Decisions being made that are just so far fetched.
Script awful. Direction awful.
You get the picture.
And a poor kitten meets an awful death, which isnt great. But the other deaths - meh
The ending is just ridiculous. I couldnt stop watching to see how bad it got, so please dont start or you may be in the same position. As i said, throw yourself down the stairs and you will have more fun. And it will make more sense than this movie.
Swim (2021)
Could a movie be any worse
I just dont think it could.
Joey Lawrence is someone from my youth i liked, so thought give it a bash. He's hardly in it.
His family? Brain dead morons.
My mouth dropped open more often than the mums shocked face at how bad it was.
The grandpa, im sorry but he was just so bad it wasnt funny.
None of the kids thought about putting clothes on?
The water didn't come through the bottom of the door?
It took Joey about 5 hours to get from their car to the house.
People swimming in a foot of water and then suddenly in 10ft.
They didnt just leave.
I could go on, but id b here all day.
It's really bad folks.
The Quarry (2022)
So disappointing
Have the people rating this high never played any games ever?
Slow, boring, bad.
Script was poor. The characters faces looked really odd when they were talking, they didnt look in each others eye lines most of the time. I guess i was spoiled by until dawn.
You couldnt run, just slow walk, which was boring. Most of the decisions you make are just boring and meaningless. Then you walk about some more.
Major snooze fest.
Stick to until dawn - far superior. This was just ridiculous. Glitchy at times with lines being repeated.
At one point, lauras story, i started doing something else completely on my phone.
Arquette and shaye are in it maybe 5 mins between them. Pass.
Luther: The Fallen Sun (2023)
Ridiculous
What a disappointment. So far fetched and storyline ridiculous.
Erivo was way out of her depth. Not sure why she was cast...her daughter did a better job. Erivo trying so hard to summon the emotion called for, but just couldnt.
The first time she put him in the boot - she failed to convey what she was trying to. Finds her "daughter", cant even manage a tear, despite the clear attempts. Not good enough.
Of course elba and serkis deliver, but they are failed by a terrible, terrible script and storyline.
The series was so much better, i dont know if they tried to go big because it was movie length, but they failed. Miserably.
Colin from Accounts (2022)
Was about to be a 9
Was about to be a nine, but then last episode and they bring out the anti vax nonsense...
Don't get me wrong, nobody and nothing should be off limits, but it's just the pure arrogance these shows display now, condescending and insulting to a large portion of their audience. No awareness, just arrogance
Real shame as really enjoyed first few episodes but when shows arrogantly make insults towards their audience, i'm out. It's meant to be funny, not dismissively rude
Characters were funny but not consistent in personality. Just whatever suited the joke/episode at the time. I could live with that for a comedy tho.
Star Trek: Picard: Disengage (2023)
Yawn
Just boring. Disappointing after the first episode.
I mean the story has hardly moved forward, well not enough for me for forty five minutes.
Beverly Crusher woke up by the end, said nothing. Worf arrived for 30 seconds. Picard & Riker shuffling about achieving nothing. Seven just not being Seven. Like anybody could be saying her lines, she is not adding anything. Such bad use.
The new captain, like really? He's made it to that level acting like that? In starfleet? Please.
We know nothing else about anything else, well except minor details that mean nothing. Let's move this on, bring in the rest of the cast and get on with it.
Nobody cares about Raff what's her name. Or even Picard at this point, who isnt Picard. But give the rest a chance...
Bad Education (2012)
Ruined
First three seasons were great, really funny, eight out of ten probably.
Fourth season just ruined it. Literally zero points. So i have given 2 because of the first three seasons.
The new characters are just not funny. Like terrible. And neither are the two returning main characters. Shame as they were funny in the first three seasons. Particularly Steven, just not funny. Rude. But not funny rude. Just arrogant rude.
I don't understand how something can go so rubbish. Attempting to tick boxes and end up with rubbish non funny nonsense that pleases nobody. Well except people that have low intelligence.
Beauty and the Beast (2017)
Couldnt have picked a worse belle
Everything was great except belle. She just cant act. Facial expression is the same whether scared, angry or in love.
She cant sing the best, hence belles lines were never in the pitch it was meant to be.
They had to make the extras appear extra ugly to make her look half decent. And even then. She walked around them with no sex appeal and making belle appear arrogant, which she was never
Whole movie ruined by her underwhelming stoney faced performance. Not sure why anybody filming this couldnt see that the only time her expression changed was when the wind was blowing in her face.
And i dont really like her. In case it wasnt clear.
Bad Company (2002)
Laughed out loud
But for the wrong reasons.
All these people saying Hopkins was great must have been on the wine while watching
He was hopeless. No chemistry with any of the actors, looked so out of place in the action scenes, delivered his lines in the same monotone no effort way. So mis-cast.
The movie was an hour too long, chris rock was better at the dramatic stuff, far too loud at other times.
And the CIA were the most incompetent team ever put together. "Just push this emergency button and we'll be there in, oh, say half an hour". Ok then.
And the first Rock starting to see an investigative reporter whilst undercover, with a different name & doing deals for nuclear weapons? Ok then.
Christmas Carole (2022)
Bad choice of actors
Jo brand makes jokes about throwing battery acid over people, Nish is unfunny, cant act & has a chip on his shoulder.
Throw in a lecture on sustainability and you have a terrible show.
I did laugh once at a joke by Eric Morcombe, confirming new comedy is dead.
Nothing made these days is any good. Too much lecturing and people thinking they are better than others.
They missed the whole irony of that with this story
And it was so obvious from point 1 what was going to happen. If they removed jo brand and nish then id have bumped up the score.
How dare we all want plastic reindeer antlers, right?
Violent Night (2022)
I just have high standards
And this just doesnt meet them.
I expect a lot of unhelpfuls given everyone else seems to love it. But what a load of rubbish.
The editing was terrible and story structure shocking.
The movie was a third (trying to be comedy), a third action/thriller, and quarter hallmark movie. Maybe it was trying to be a parody. But it wasnt. It missed the mark on every one. Pick a lane. Or if your going to do more than one, you need to be good at it
Nothing made sense/was explained - viking anybody? Anybody got any idea how difficult it would be to move £300m in cash with all the (useless) security?
Ok ok im maybe taking it too seriously, but man alive. Everybody was horrible except the wee girl, but even she was annoying, like ur 10 love, not 4.
And i love beverly d'angelo but, like, can she not move at all? It was like she couldnt move.
4 stars as the acting wasnt that bad. Leguizamo was particularly good as usual.
Inside Job (2021)
Second season awful
First season was 8 out of 10.
Second season -6. So 2.
The first season was witty and different. Second season is just pathetic, old, barrel scrapping leftist rubbish
What a shame because it could have got better and better. But like a lot of adult cartoons these days, they start good and then think they are morally superior and we all need constant insults from their ivory tower
I didnt mind the jabs in the first season, because they were directed at both/all sides. Second season is just bias with no character development.
Nobody watches an ADULT CARTOON for moral lessons. Just be abusive, rude, crazy etc cause your meant to be able to get away with it.
Wednesday (2022)
Disappointing
I wanted this to be a good new series for me. When i heard catharine zeta jones was going to be morticia, i was excited.
She gets one of the stars, she was good. But only in 2 episodes. What. Gomez was good. 2 episodes. Uncle fester (not a fan of the actor, but the character) 1 episode.
I get it, i get it, it is called Wednesday, it's not about the rest of them. That's the problem though. She needs the rest of them to work. Her relationship with her brother for example works.
Here, she is just rude, unpleasant and doesnt work. She isn't likeable. So as your main character, that's not good. I get they thought her "witty" responses were funny, but they werent.
It's why Wednesday only works as part of the family, not the main character. It's too much of the same.
And dont get me started on werewolves, sirens etc.
Just keep her with the family, keep her as the main character if you want, but have the rest as side characters helping her through her life etc.
Oh and the other 2 stars are for the original and best Wednesday - Christina Ricci.
The Menu (2022)
Just awful
The 2 points are for the acting from some of the side characters and a couple of "margos" scenes.
But the chef & about a boy man, were just awful. The "storyline" was just awful. No real understanding of why all these people suddenly decided to do a mass murder/suicide.
Killing innocent (though annoying) people, after obviously being just good chefs. And then everyone just getting their credit cards out and then sitting there with marshmallows on their bodies, waiting to die.
Get the h up and move. Just ridiculous. The attempts to escape were pathetic. Yeah they were out numbered but get up and fight, dont just accept it, you are going to die anyway, so try something, take someone out etc.
And then the cheeseburger. Please.
Halloween Ends (2022)
So disappointing
I waited all year for this. Love the Halloween franchise. Love Michael and Laurie. And they chose to end it like this?
Focusing on an unbelievable new character that can beat Michael easily?
The granddaughter having a personality transplant. A nurse. But acts like she's in love with a complete stranger before even a first kiss.
Scenes that made no sense. The writer should never write again.
Michael should have been killing the whole movie. This was meant to be his end. And we get nonsense. Unbelievable actions by most of the cast.
So disappointed. Watch Halloween kills and pretend that was the last one.
The Watcher (2022)
Dont start
Do yourself a favour and dont waste your time. What a let down of a last episode.
Hardy anything makes sense.
None of the neighbours are normal.
Nobody acts normal or realistic.
The "explanation" or lack of, is a let down
If the daughter did what she did in real life, she would be disowned and the family would never recover.
Some of the acting from the side characters wasnt great. Maybe they knew it was just a waste of time.
And it was, just a waste of time.
Apparently you can make seven episodes of nonsense and people will think it's great, as long as you have Ryan Murphy's name attached.
Dont waste your time.
The Invitation (2022)
Awful
How did this get made?
Actually the storyline was fine. But the script and direction was awful.
Of course a few mandatory comments about us Brits all being the big r word etc
Girl had a chip on her shoulder.
Cousins acting was awful.
It was cheesy and embarrassing.
Just so unbelievable...and im not talking about the vampire bit, that was the most believable thing about it. What wasnt was how she acted. Her behaviour was just ridiculous and lack of questioning anything...i mean, not asking where the bride was until day 3. Not even at the bridal shower.
Im not sure what else to say about it to be honest. The two female vamps were actually good but i cant give more than a 1 for the awfulness.
The Batman (2022)
Long and boring
I dont see how true Batman fans could give this movie more than 5. And anybody who likes movies more either.
It's slow, it's boring.
Started off ok but went downhill fast.
Pattison not bad as batman tbf, but as bruce wayne, zero.
And all the great characters they had to work with, and they made them all nothing like their actual characters.
Diversity box was ticked, of course.
Watch Batman Returns and see how these characters are meant to be done.
Star Trek: Picard (2020)
Wish this never happened
Season 1 gets 6 stars. Season 2 gets 1. So overall 3.
Season 1 was ok. Picard ar least was a bit more like Picard than he is in season 2
Season 2 is terrible. Like really bad. Stewart is not acting as Picard, but as an old lost man. Almost like Biden. Cant really walk/move or act anymore.
I stopped watching during ep4 as it was just woke nonsense. Then i heard about the other cast coming back for the last season. So i thought i'd get through this one so that I could follow the next one as i want to see Worf, Beverly etc.
And i managed that by fast forwarding most of it. Boring. Boring. Boring. Almost all Picards scenes anyway were very boring.
John De Lancie steals every scene he is in and is the only thing giving it the one star.
Longhorns (2011)
Yep. If ur that way inclined, worth it
So it's not an epic or a piece of art or even fandabbydozy.
But it's good. And if you are gay, this is for you.
Every main character is fully naked. There is a story. Cant rate it higher as it's very much made for people like us and nobody else. If the site was just for gay movies, then 10 out of 10. But it's not and cant give higher than a 6 for that reason. But 6 is still good. And man alive, if you are gay, like me, you will enjoy this. Maybe too much.
Fortitude (2015)
Season 1 gets it to 5 stars
Then it just gets worse and worse and more ridiculous and unbelievable. Like i know you need to have some form of putting reality to one side, but dont produce a show that you initially try to have some realism then go into madness. Dont watch season 2 onwards.
Escape Room: Tournament of Champions (2021)
Could have been higher
If it wasnt for the lead actress. I dont remember her speaking so annoyingly in the first movie
Also the secondary storyline re the daughter. Pass.
But the rooms etc were great.