Anybody expecting the acerbic wit of Curb Your Enthusiasm (due to Jeff Garlin's presence) or the belly laughs of Something About Mary (due to Sarah Silverman's presence) will be sorely disappointed. The film isn't bad, but "not bad" is hardly a recommendation, which is a shame, because there's some great talent involved. Jeff Garlin seems to have cashed in a lot of favors with Second city alumni and fellow stand-up comics to help him out on his feature film directorial debut, and I'm guessing that none of them will be putting this on their resumés. It's got several inspired plot mechanics that go nowhere, like the fake cast of "Streetcar Named Desire" starring Aaron Carter and Gina Gershon (who are both great at scene stealing, which is quite a feat when you read the laundry list of well known participants) but someone should have told director Garlin that cameos do not a film make. The film is essentially without plot and tends to meander from one situational set-up to the next without really developing a story. This lends an episodic feel at best and at its worst, it comes off as mundane. It seems to be going for an early 90s indie-comedy nostalgia, but it lacks the innovation and quite frankly the era that made those films appealing. It's shot well, but still has a stagy, direct-to-video look, and the music is so dinner-theater schmaltzy that you'd swear this was shot-in-Canada (it wasn't). The performers are obviously having a good time, but the whole project seems to be about ten years past relevance, and I -for one- have always hated watching performers have an obviously better time than their audience, but at least nobody is ghost walking through their roles, which lends an improvisational spirit even if it goes nowhere. It's not offensively bad; it's definitely watchable. But if you have any expectations arising from the supporting cast -actors from Little Miss Sunshine, Strangers With Candy, The Simpsons- you'll be more than aggravated that you wasted your time on this rather than rewatching one of those aforementioned titles instead. And with the title "I Want Someone To Eat Cheese With" they've all but assured that nobody's going to watch it anyways. You can do a lot worse, but you can do a whole lot better, too.
