Thanh Tra Giả Gái (2004)
Lochlyn Munro: Agent Jake Harper
Photos
Quotes
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[Kevin and Marcus approach the desk at the hotel, disguised as Brittany and Tiffany, respectively. "Brittany"'s fake breasts knock over multiple items on the desk]
Kevin Copeland : Sorry. Um... um... They're new. Dr. Dorfman did an *amazing* job.
Marcus Copeland : [squeezes "Brittany"'s breast] They feel *so* real.
Agent Jake Harper : Hi. I, I, um... I need a credit card, please. And, and some I.D., please.
Kevin Copeland : ["Brittany" takes "her" I.D. out of "her" handbag and realizes it has Kevin's information and photo on. "She" quickly thinks and acts offended] Credit card? I.D.? I'm *so* freakin' pissed*! First of all, I go to Dr. Dorf and he totally messes up my nose job. I ask him to make me look like Gwyneth Paltrow... I get off the surgery table looking like freakin' *Shrek*! Then I get *here*, and Mr. *Harper* makes me feel like I'm some dumb blonde with fake boobs going to a Hugh Hefner party!
Agent Jake Harper : No, I-I didn't mean to offend you; it's just, it's... it's protocol!
Kevin Copeland : I'm gonna have a B.F.!
Marcus Copeland : Oh, my God... She's gonna have a bitch fit!
Agent Jake Harper : No, no, no, d-d-don't have a-a-a B.F. now.
Kevin Copeland : I wanna speak to your supervisor! Better yet, I'm gonna write a letter!
Marcus Copeland : [to Harper] You are in *big* trouble!
Kevin Copeland : [Agitated, "Brittany" grabs a pen and a sheet of paper and starts writing] Dear... Mr... Royal... Hampton. I... am... a... *white*... woman... in... America.
Section Chief Elliott Gordon : [appears] Ladies, is there a problem here?
Marcus Copeland , Kevin Copeland : Yes.
Agent Jake Harper : No! Sir, no, no, there's... there's no problem.
Section Chief Elliott Gordon : These are two of our VIP guests. Issue them keys. Immediately.
Agent Jake Harper : [nods nervously] Yes, sir.
Marcus Copeland : [to Harper] V. I. P. Learn your acronyms, okay?
Kevin Copeland : [to Gordon after he hands the "girls" room cards] What a sweetheart!
Section Chief Elliott Gordon : Enjoy your stay.
Kevin Copeland : Has anyone ever told you you look *just* like Denzel Washington?
Section Chief Elliott Gordon : [laughing] Yeah, actually I have heard it once... or twice.
Kevin Copeland : What a beautiful chocolate man! Beautiful!
["Brittany" and "Tiffany" walk away giggling; Gordon and Harper exchange puzzled looks]
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Agent Vincent Gomez : So, who do you think wore those panties you were sniffing? Kevin or Marcus?
Agent Jake Harper : Gomez, l told you. l was looking for DNA...
Section Chief Elliott Gordon : Oh, yeah.
Agent Jake Harper : What are you laughing at, ''Denzel''? ''Oh, what a beautiful chocolate man!'' hahahaha
Section Chief Elliott Gordon : You guys got some work to do?