25 reviews
Where else can you see David Niven called a Jive Turkey?
- BaronBl00d
- May 30, 2014
- Permalink
Good Actors - Terrible Story - Not Many Laughs
The movie is just not all that funny - you would expect a comedy to give more laughs than this film gave us. It has a few moments worth of giggles but not bust-a-gut laughter like one wants from a comedy.
All the actors are fine - really good. It's just a terrible story with very few laughs.
I have to agree with other reviewers that Dracula's problem is not that she's black but that he wanted his wife, Vampira, the way he remembered her - he just wanted his wife back. He felt he was with another woman because she acts different and looks different.
It's such a shame the comedy wasn't funnier and the storyline a bit better because this film had the potential to be really comical if better written.
3.5/10
All the actors are fine - really good. It's just a terrible story with very few laughs.
I have to agree with other reviewers that Dracula's problem is not that she's black but that he wanted his wife, Vampira, the way he remembered her - he just wanted his wife back. He felt he was with another woman because she acts different and looks different.
It's such a shame the comedy wasn't funnier and the storyline a bit better because this film had the potential to be really comical if better written.
3.5/10
- Rainey-Dawn
- Apr 15, 2016
- Permalink
Old, but mostly weak & pitiable Dracula
This movie often gets accused of being a "Young Frankenstein" rip-off, but the producers only altered the title from "Vampira" into "Old Dracula" to cash in on the tremendous success of Mel Brooks horror spoof. The truth is that "Vampira" got filmed prior to "Young Frankenstein" and it also can't hold a candle to that film, as this is a truly poor and almost pitiable attempt at comedy. The great cast, including David Niven and Peter Bayliss, do whatever they can, but Clive Donner's direction is uninspired and especially Jeremy Lloyd's screenplay is anemic and almost entirely devoid of laughs and creativity. In Transylvania, Count Dracula and his male servant Maltravers are hosting tourist tours in the old castle, and every once and a while this also allows them to restorage their blood reserves. When a group of Playboy models visits the castle, they discover that one of them has the same and extremely rare blood type of Dracula's deceased wife Vampira. But, as mandatory in lame comedy, the samples get mixed up and the count's beloved wife resurrects as a feisty black girl. Reason enough for the old-fashioned Count to travel to swinging London where his conservative life-style naturally conflicts with the free-spirited mentality. The best parts of the films are the dialogs between Niven and Bayliss, and even those are lukewarm at best. Everything else is downright pathetic, with as absolute low points Dracula's "night on the town" and the predictable finale with atrocious make-up effects.
Kitchy but kind of cool
I caught this on cable, and found it quite amusing. Not laugh out loud, but still rather good. Granted, it's no masterpiece, but I enjoyed it for what it was, a kitchy cool retro film from the 70's. I love watching bad 60's and 70's films for the music, the clothes, the decor...and this was the perfect film. How can you deny seeing London at the end of the swingin' 60's? And the Playboy element, the swinging party...I don't know. I took this film for what it was, and I would definitely watch it again....
Maybe the fact that I watched it as a morning double feature with Vincent Price's "Scream and Scream Again" helped me get into the mood for this...
Maybe the fact that I watched it as a morning double feature with Vincent Price's "Scream and Scream Again" helped me get into the mood for this...
- Malibukitten
- Mar 26, 2006
- Permalink
My Offense and Defense
This movie is rather offensive. Not because I am Black and that I should take offense to the premise, but that they should spoof Dracula to the point where even a card carrying Van Helsing club member would be offended. This movie seemed as if it was a British writer trying to compete with Mel Brooks. I am not offended with the premise because I must defend the actors who chose to do such a dreadful movie. Ms. Graves found popularity by being a beautiful funny Black woman on Laugh In. She needed work and wanted to also be accepted by the public and further her career. She was one of the few Black women to play a lead role with the great David Niven. David Niven, on the other hand, was in his last days as a lead and his last years on earth. He valiantly tried to make something out of nothing. I don't think he (Dracula) was concerned with the color of his bride's skin more than seeing her the way he remembered her. Vampira was sexy enough to grace the last scenes of the movie and even seduce the two lead men. It seems as if the writer was celebrating the new times and he wanted to join the party of real race relations. Ms. Graves went on to have her own series for a short while and I think she made an impact on many young girls and taught them to stand for themselves. The only thing that was disturbing to me was that the young actor playing the Don Juan like character looks a lot like Jeremy Pivens. The end was very predictable and it made the whole thing look like what it was meant to be; A meaningless pursuit of the old ways while change to the new ways ended up not being so bad. In fact the change helped in the end. This movie was fun and the limited nudity expressed some class. I would recommend it to only those with an affinity to the art of movies and you should remember the times when this was done. I believe this was just at the start of Blacksploitation, disco and spoofs. In conclusion, it was a failed attempt to suck blood from the new times and still win favor of the old school. I think I would watch it again, though.
- blandiefam
- Oct 31, 2009
- Permalink
Times are tough in Transylvania
David Niven's career hit rock bottom when he played the one and only Count Dracula in Vampira. Niven's dapper English charm is truly put to the test her and it fails.
Times are tough in Transylvania and Castle Dracula is now being rented out as a tourist attraction. The money's good and one can take an occasional bite out of a tourist. But Niven's real mission is to find the right blood to revive the Countess who's been asleep since the Roaring Twenties.
He finds the right blood from one of the tourists, but lo and behold the countess wakes up and turns black into someone that looks a whole lot like Teresa Graves. What to do, Niven's a most conservative Dracula and apparently interracial marriage is frowned on.
The rest of the film is spent on Niven trying to find a cure for Graves. And listening to Graves calling Niven such things as 'jive turkey' with both of them wondering where she's pick up the latest slang.
A few years earlier Godfrey Cambridge did Watermelon Man which laid a giant ostrich egg with the same kind of humor. It's not any funnier with Teresa Graves.
And David Niven should have been ashamed of himself.
Times are tough in Transylvania and Castle Dracula is now being rented out as a tourist attraction. The money's good and one can take an occasional bite out of a tourist. But Niven's real mission is to find the right blood to revive the Countess who's been asleep since the Roaring Twenties.
He finds the right blood from one of the tourists, but lo and behold the countess wakes up and turns black into someone that looks a whole lot like Teresa Graves. What to do, Niven's a most conservative Dracula and apparently interracial marriage is frowned on.
The rest of the film is spent on Niven trying to find a cure for Graves. And listening to Graves calling Niven such things as 'jive turkey' with both of them wondering where she's pick up the latest slang.
A few years earlier Godfrey Cambridge did Watermelon Man which laid a giant ostrich egg with the same kind of humor. It's not any funnier with Teresa Graves.
And David Niven should have been ashamed of himself.
- bkoganbing
- Dec 2, 2013
- Permalink
Anemic attempt at comedy.
Vampira (also known as 'Old Dracula', presumably in the hope that someone would confuse it with the excellent 'Young Frankenstein', released in the same year) is a feeble spoof of vampire films for those who don't like either (a) vampires or (b) laughing. An aging Dracula attempts to revive his beloved Vampira with transfusions from Playboy bunnies, but the wrong blood sample somehow transforms her into Teresa Graves, so he goes to London to get more white blood cells. Niven lends some dignity to this mildly offensive nonsense, but it's tragically short on good jokes: 'Love at First Bite' did it much better, and even 'Dracula: Dead and Loving It' has more laughs.
- Mephisto-24
- Mar 10, 2001
- Permalink
Mildly amusing, but never particularly funny.
- grendelkhan
- Jun 5, 2012
- Permalink
Falls flat
I really wanted to like this, but Old Dracula was too boring and lacking in purpose that I found it hard to do. The film actually is really sharp looking, the sets, the costumes, all look really good. ( Giving a huge nod to Hammer). David Niven is a good Dracula and there is no shortage of pretty girls either. However, I had a hard time staying awake with this film. This is supposed to be a comedy and I didn't find much of this funny. Maybe I just didn't get it with the British sense of humor going over my head. At least I got to see Dracula get called a jive turkey. But if it's a disco themed Dracula movie, I would much rather watch something that is more fun. Love At First Bite comes to mind and is a lot better than this.
- dworldeater
- May 24, 2023
- Permalink
Not too bad.
David Niven has a role that is clearly beneath his stature (in his first scene, he is reading a Playboy magazine), and Clive Donner's direction is almost embarrassingly crude (the dreadful copy I saw made it look even worse than it is, but it's crude nonetheless). Still, the movie has some unexpectedly clever lines (Dracula's assistant to his master: "I cross my fingers, sir" - Dracula's response: "I'd rather you didn't"), and (don't crucify me for this) I really found it more enjoyable than Polanski's overrated "Fearless Vampire Killers" - mainly because it has no pretensions of greatness. (**)
The comedy movie that sucks.
This is a comedy about Dracula. Most comedies about Dracula are funny. This one is not. If a Dracula movie is not going to be funny then is should at lest be scary. This movie is not scary. It as an awful story line. The ending is awful. There are good actors in this movie. But they wasted there talent being in this awful movie. Do not wast your money. Do not see this movie. Do not wast your time. Do not see this movie. It is the comedy movie that sucks. There are a lot of comedy movie that suck. And this is one of them. This movie is pooh pooh. Do not see this movie. I need more line and I am running out of thing to say.
- jacobjohntaylor1
- May 18, 2015
- Permalink
A humorous film putting a Brit Twist on the Dracula Legend.
Though it has been several years since I saw this film, I recall enough to wish I could find it on video..or better DVD.
I happen to like David Niven and found this film rather enjoyable. I would expect that one would need to be able to grasp some of the subtle humor that a good number of Britcoms are known for to really enjoy some of the more funny bits.
I happen to like David Niven and found this film rather enjoyable. I would expect that one would need to be able to grasp some of the subtle humor that a good number of Britcoms are known for to really enjoy some of the more funny bits.
- The_Pendragon
- Jul 12, 2002
- Permalink
A camp disco Dracula
Almost so bad it's brilliant, this is one of the more strange versions of Dracula. Set in London in the seventies we see an older Dracula (David Niven) hosting parties for young people at his castle. He's searching for suitable blood to bring his former lover Vampira (Teresa Graves) back to life. Only trouble is when it works she is now black much to Dracula's distaste. They must try again with the help of Marc (Nicky Henson) who unwillingly gets samples of blood from girls.
It's certainly a camp version of the Dracula story, but it has a certain charm and is obviously being played for laughs.
It's certainly a camp version of the Dracula story, but it has a certain charm and is obviously being played for laughs.
- neil-douglas2010
- Feb 17, 2023
- Permalink
There are some Dark Shadows surrounding David Niven's solo appearance as Count Dracula.
- mark.waltz
- Jul 4, 2019
- Permalink
PITIFUL!
Someone, please, bite THEM and put them out of their misery....really bad acting, really bad plot, yuck, yuck, yuck! yucky! This one is just so bad I can't believe that David Niven even lent himself to starring in this. He must have been short on cash to star in this dog. Oh, and the music! It's this music that is really trying to be hip and disco, don't forget, this was made in 1974, the start of the disco era. There are not enough words to say how bad this movie is, but I keep having to say them because IMDB will not let me post unless I have 10 lines! Please, if you see this advertised on TV, do not watch! It is a big waste of your time. Unless you are stoned or something and then maybe you would laugh your head off. Otherwise, stay away! On a scale of 10, I give it a 0!
Strictly for Niven's fans...all others bevare!
Terrible comedy from once-respected British director Clive Donner, a modern-day Dracula tale told with a comedic bent, and with a bevy of Playboy models for victims (in case we missed which corporation these ladies work for, the Playboy Club in London is prominently featured). Vampire David Niven needs the blood of nubile playthings to keep wife Teresa Graves alive, and the only commendable thing you can say about this scenario is the relaxed way in which white men and black women interact sexually. The jokes are stale, the picture looks crummy, and the final gag is ridiculous. It took four more years to get a bloody good Dracula comedy, "Love at First Bite", which puts this one to shame. NO STARS from ****
- moonspinner55
- May 9, 2011
- Permalink
You watch to see how bad it can get!
Is this what we watched in the 70's? Guess we did.
Do not EVER compare this to a Mel Brooks FRANKENSTEIN classic, as one reviewer did.
I am sorry for Niven for ever choosing to be in it. So black person's blood transfusion turns you black? Let's just say liberals TODAY would have a field day with this one. The only funny thing about it.
At least no swearing.
Do not EVER compare this to a Mel Brooks FRANKENSTEIN classic, as one reviewer did.
I am sorry for Niven for ever choosing to be in it. So black person's blood transfusion turns you black? Let's just say liberals TODAY would have a field day with this one. The only funny thing about it.
At least no swearing.
- joannejerome
- Dec 4, 2021
- Permalink
What a load of old tosh.
Count Dracula (David Niven) opens his castle to tourists, draining blood from the guests in an attempt to find someone whose rare blood type can revive his beloved wife Vampira. Success comes when he uses blood drawn from a group of Playboy playmates, but the vampire is shocked when the revived Vampira turns black. Together with his loyal assistant Maltravers (Peter Bayliss) and his wife (blaxploitation babe Teresa Graves), Dracula travels to London to find a way to restore Vampira's original colour.
While watching the opening credits for Vampira, I was delighted to see the name of one of my favourites actresses, 'Confessions..' beauty Linda Hayden, but sadly she isn't in the film for long: she wears a blouse unbuttoned to reveal some tempting boobage, and gets turned into a sexy vampire by Count Dracula, but is dispatched all too soon by Maltravers, who shoots a crossbow bolt through her heart.
With Linda gone so quickly, I felt just a little downhearted, but put my trust in writer Jeremy Lloyd (creator of the excellent 'Are You Being Served?'), usually reliable star Niven, several more lovely ladies (including Hammer hottie Veronica Carlson), plus many a familiar face from British cinema and TV of the '70s. Surely 'Carry On' legend Bernard Bresslaw and TV favourite Frank Thornton (Captain Peacock from 'Are You Being Served?') wouldn't let me down...
Unfortunately, Lloyd's script is extremely poor, stuffed with stale humour that rarely works, and there's very little the talented cast can do to generate laughs. The whole 'black Vampira' plotline is horribly dated and embarrassingly un-PC, more cringeworthy than chucklesome. After lots of weak vampiric shenanigans, in which Dracula hypnotises Playboy employee Marc (Nicky Henson) to do his bidding, we are given a truly awful finalé that sees David Niven sporting dreadful black make-up, Dracula having been bitten by his wife.
While watching the opening credits for Vampira, I was delighted to see the name of one of my favourites actresses, 'Confessions..' beauty Linda Hayden, but sadly she isn't in the film for long: she wears a blouse unbuttoned to reveal some tempting boobage, and gets turned into a sexy vampire by Count Dracula, but is dispatched all too soon by Maltravers, who shoots a crossbow bolt through her heart.
With Linda gone so quickly, I felt just a little downhearted, but put my trust in writer Jeremy Lloyd (creator of the excellent 'Are You Being Served?'), usually reliable star Niven, several more lovely ladies (including Hammer hottie Veronica Carlson), plus many a familiar face from British cinema and TV of the '70s. Surely 'Carry On' legend Bernard Bresslaw and TV favourite Frank Thornton (Captain Peacock from 'Are You Being Served?') wouldn't let me down...
Unfortunately, Lloyd's script is extremely poor, stuffed with stale humour that rarely works, and there's very little the talented cast can do to generate laughs. The whole 'black Vampira' plotline is horribly dated and embarrassingly un-PC, more cringeworthy than chucklesome. After lots of weak vampiric shenanigans, in which Dracula hypnotises Playboy employee Marc (Nicky Henson) to do his bidding, we are given a truly awful finalé that sees David Niven sporting dreadful black make-up, Dracula having been bitten by his wife.
- BA_Harrison
- Jun 22, 2019
- Permalink
What on Earth is it?
This movie is one of the most confusing things I've ever seen. Is it a bawdy comedy, a serious drama, a spoof horror, it can't decide. David Niven can't seem to pin down if he's playing a part that's more James Bond or Blofeld and to say the story arc of his character hasn't aged well is an understatement.
Theres a few good moments and certainly plenty of titillating visuals, but mostly it's just puzzling what the heck they were going for.
I guess it's one good point is it's certainly unique.
Theres a few good moments and certainly plenty of titillating visuals, but mostly it's just puzzling what the heck they were going for.
I guess it's one good point is it's certainly unique.
- DoctorThotcer
- Jan 26, 2022
- Permalink
Not utterly terrible, but terribly imbalanced
- I_Ailurophile
- Nov 7, 2021
- Permalink
Quite racist
- ericstevenson
- Aug 1, 2016
- Permalink
Not quite blaxploitation, not quite a comedy, not quite good.
The core idea of the film (Dracula accidentally turning his wife black by using a black woman's blood to resurrect her) has so much possibility. There are so many jokes you could make about prejudice, and old fashioned ideas, interracial relationships, etc, but the film doesn't do any of that. It doesn't really do much of anything. You might expect Dracula to overcome his apprehension about his wife now being black, realize the superficiality of his concern, and just be happy to be reunited, but that also doesn't happen. He's just unhappy about his wife being black and tries to change her back. He never develops or realizes he's wrong. He's just uptight through the whole movie. There's no real moral or messaging about racism or love. I suppose the ending is supposed to give us something like that, but it really doesn't, and the ending REALLY doesn't age well. Totally a wasted concept and cast.
- ecmelton-186-105049
- Aug 21, 2019
- Permalink
AKA 'Old Niven', 'Old Clueless Niven', 'Old David Niven in a Bad Blacksploitation Spoof'
Niven plays a modern-day Dracula who, when discovering a young model with an ideal blood-type, then seduces the hot-bodied Afro-American, and drains her of her plasma to rejuvinate his eon-slumbering vampire bride. But it it all goes snafu when the new corbuscles turn his pale Transylvanian beauty into a dark-skinned vamp with an insatiable sexual appetite, much to her hubbies tight-faced disdain.
Bad, stupid, bad-bad, dumb, silly, awful, stinking, wreaking, bad, lousy, offensive, grotesque, bad-bad-bad movie!!
Bad, stupid, bad-bad, dumb, silly, awful, stinking, wreaking, bad, lousy, offensive, grotesque, bad-bad-bad movie!!
Vampira!
Vampira is a boring film that without its terrific cast would likely be unwatchable. For a horror/comedy, there's nothing remotely creepy about any of the set pieces and only a smattering of lukewarm jokes.
David Niven injects a lot of charm into the character of Dracula, scurrying through his lines, and Teresa Graves is beguiling as his resurrected wife Vampira. That the subsequent merriment is based on the fact that Vampira has become non-Caucasian as a result of a blood mix-up, the results could have been a lot more awkward. Whilst the humour is always treading water (except at the end), it is never mean-spirited, just not very funny.
And that's the problem. Events roll on and on, with only a familiar face cropping up every so often to sustain any interest. Written by Jeremy Lloyd, who with David Croft co-wrote many successful UK sitcoms, 'Vampira' suggests that Croft might have been the funny one. My score is 3 out of 10.
David Niven injects a lot of charm into the character of Dracula, scurrying through his lines, and Teresa Graves is beguiling as his resurrected wife Vampira. That the subsequent merriment is based on the fact that Vampira has become non-Caucasian as a result of a blood mix-up, the results could have been a lot more awkward. Whilst the humour is always treading water (except at the end), it is never mean-spirited, just not very funny.
And that's the problem. Events roll on and on, with only a familiar face cropping up every so often to sustain any interest. Written by Jeremy Lloyd, who with David Croft co-wrote many successful UK sitcoms, 'Vampira' suggests that Croft might have been the funny one. My score is 3 out of 10.
Old Dracula
Dreadful comedy with an aging Niven looking as if he sleeps with the dead, playing the Count in his later years.