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No One Will Save You (2023)
Oh heavy sigh
The issue with movies that have no dialogue is that you are always waiting for someone to talk, this waiting game can distract you from what's going on because you become so focussed on is someone going to say something! With no speaking other than one line " I'm sorry Maude" you have to listen to non stop grunting, sighing and heavy breathing which becomes tiresome. I wanted to turn this movie off but it is the car crash you can't turn away from. The war of the worlds feel seems like a rip off as soon as the space ships show up, the premise is never really known and leaves the viewer to draw their own conclusion, another frustration.
Black Christmas (1974)
1974 classic horror
It appears many are having a difficult time conducting a review of a 1974 film through a 2023 lens, I was in grade eight when this movie came out and I can remember two classmates sneaking into the theatre to watch this movie and they quickly became folk hero's for their effort. Movies like Black Christmas and The Texas Chainsaw were gritty ground breaking terror in their day and the original films still hold up today - so when reviewing them take that in to consideration and appreciate them for what they are, disturbing poorly lit sets and poor sound quality are all part of the classic charm.
Inventing Anna (2022)
Rubber faced reporter
Basically a sex in the city meets Hallmark vibe with Anna's annoying fake accent and the reporters facial expressions. Episodes should have been shorter but in the end it was entertaining for the most part, be on the lookout for the other cast of characters from the TV series American Greed.
The Thing About Pam (2022)
Watch more than one episode
Don't pay attention to anyone that only watched one episode due to lack of attention span and feel they have enough information to conduct a review. I first watched the Dateline show of this crime and felt a little uneasy about how the trailer for this series seemed to be comedy based, however I watched it anyway and it was highly entertaining. Yes it was a real sad event.
Spencer (2021)
Oh dear
I couldn't get past the fact it looked like Kristen Stewart was playing Kate McKinnon who was playing Lady Di. A beautifully filmed artsy mess. Nothing much more to ad but I need more words added for the review to go through.
Digging to Death (2021)
Yes
If you see one movie in 2022 then make sure it's "Digging to death" you'll laugh, you'll cry and you'll look deep inside yourself and question what other mysteries does our universe hold.
Aftermath (2021)
Just strange
So I thought at first I was watching an afternoon soap opera, then it kinda went to a Hallmark family movie feel but without all the Christmas decorations, then it had a "and i'd of got away with it if it wasn't for you meddling kids" kinda groove. It just wasn't all that good, that said I didn't turn it off.
The Prodigy (2019)
Don't watch the trailer
Not sure why this movie is getting all the so so reviews, it's well acted, well filmed and keeps your attention. I don't watch trailers as they tend to highlight what should be a surprise, so don't watch it either. Creepy moments and good story make for an enjoyable watch.
The Night They Knocked (2019)
They knocked, we waited to be killed
So why do punks always wait until they are bloodied, buttered and tired before they decide to fight back? Doesn't it make more sense to take care of business sooner? I think if this movie was taken back to the editing room and had some of the amateurish scenes shortened (or deleted) and a real soundtrack was added instead of this annoying crap that doesn't fit, then it would help a lot. Oh and why can't groups of friends be as tough with bad guys as they act with each other lol.
The Flight Attendant (2020)
Sitcom acting style
Started off good as a "who done it" and then quickly turned in to just another chick flick.
The Vanished (2020)
Fun camping trip
It was both ok and frustrating, I should have stuck with my hunch when they arrived at the camp site, what would be the first thing a kid would do when getting there? would they not run out of the RV with the dog down to the water and start playing? ah but not this kid - stick with it until the end.
Fantasy Island (2020)
Come on Blumhouse!
Sometimes you hit it out of the park and other times you deal us this! It's a convoluted mess that missed the mark. Yes I still look forward to future Blumhouse projects because I know you have it in you!
Gypsy (2017)
Like reading a book with the last page ripped out
We have nine episodes that for the most part are entertaining, and a tenth episode that falls apart leaving too many questions on the table. If you don't like to invest time in a series only to have a lazy ending, then skip this one.
The Wrong Missy (2020)
Just wrong
I'm typing this while the movie is still on, it's annoying nonsense right from the beginning - Missy looks and acts like a female Gilligan! How does this type of stuff get a green light? Just pass on it.
The Front Runner (2018)
Chaotic
The start of this film is so damn annoying with all the talking over each other it becomes hard to watch, yes I fully understand that election campaigns are tense and busy but this nonsense just goes on and on. The scandal scene when it arrives, is boring and over before it begins, the whole reason for this movie and him dropping out of the race is in a scene that is over in less than half of a Boston soundtrack song. He comes across as highly unlikeable for the most part except when he helps a young reporter get over his fear of flying, then later the reporter turns on him and he then becomes unlikeable.
House of the Witch (2017)
Magic store gore
What a waste, this could have been so much better. There weren't even any cheap jump scares or tense moments, just bad special effects around a group of kids with no chemistry. Here's some advice for the next movie you make, it's what you don't see that is truly scary.
Color Out of Space (2019)
No, just no
To be honest I had to turn the movie off before it ended, it was absolutely terrible. I get Nick has to make a movie from every script put in front of him but good god enough is enough.!
The Wretched (2019)
First three minutes great!
And then the opening credits start to roll and it's down hill from there. Teen romp with an 80's feel that has a few jump scares. The movie doesn't know what it wants to be, maybe a horror? a teen romance? it's not worth your time.
El Camino (2019)
Perfect timing
I was late to the dance with the BB series as I only started watching it half way through the pandemic. I had heard how great it was so figured I'd invest sine time watching it. After we finished episode 16 of season 5 we went straight to "El Camino" and the transition was flawless. Maybe some of the lower ratings on here are due to the amount of time that has passed since viewing the series? It never skipped a beat and felt like episode 17 of season five.
Driven (2018)
Why the Sudeikis hate
I'm usually the first to jump on SNL cast members making movies because they drag half of the cast with them, then you get the long skit version effect - but this is not that movie. Sudeikis is great as the annoying weirdo and has good chemistry with all the players around him. The story is good as an over view of Deloreans struggle so just enjoy the ride and don't look to deep into it.
Soul Surfer (2011)
Blonde Haired Blue Eyed Utopia
A terrible tragedy rocks a beautiful all American family turning their perfect world upside down for awhile. Perfect looking people with perfect beach bodies highlight the beautiful scenery, This movie would probably be more at home on the Christian or Hallmark channel as there are strong religious overtones that come in to play throughout. Some will love this movie and others will not, it doesn't really matter because at the end of the day, everyone is still beautiful.
Trauma Center (2019)
Wheres my Bruce Willis
I believe Bruce was abducted by aliens and an exact double of him was placed in this movie. It looked like him but didn't sound like him at all, and this person couldn't act or was over-acting I'm not sure. The movie was really bad! but back to Bruce. It seems obvious now that he needs to have cocky one liners while looking over his shoulder smirking, if he doesn't do that and then he is awful?
Girl on the Third Floor (2019)
Marbles and doorbells oh my
If I saw this guy jump one more time when the doorbell rang I was going to throw my slipper at the TV, and don't get me going on the marbles that appear from the wall and "other places", simply put there can be too much of a good thing.
So the main character attempting to renovate the house ( I think he installed the dry wall patch wrong side out?) is driven by metal music, alcohol and a weakness for beautiful sexy woman that show up 10 minutes after he moves in. However the more he does the more the house bleeds ooze and black sludge. Yea he makes questionable decisions considering his wife is pregnant and yet to show up. He will spend most of the time in the house by himself and then she will show up and spend time in the house by herself? guess they don't want to be together.
The whole ugly event could have been remedied had the female preacher that lives in the church across the street had of just told him about the haunted history of the house the minute he moved in? she could have told him to GET OUT - but I guess God doesn't work that way.
Kidnap (2017)
Post Apocalyptic freeways
So we have mother that has seen her son put in a strangers car and now the chase ensues, and it goes on and on and on and on. Even when she has the chance to end it by running over the driver when he exits the vehicle she decides not to. The chase takes place on seeming empty roads and highways that have no traffic jams or congestion. In one scene a Police Officer on a motorcycle is attempting to pull her over when the kidnapping vehicle squeezes the officer between their two cars, this goes on for about a mile or so and results in all three going off the road in to an open area and not one other car saw what happened? The boy was being taken for an international child kidnapping ring, if the mother was being this much of an issue to their plan the kidnappers would have just killed her no?. But then we wouldn't have a had a movie.
It Chapter Two (2019)
The best part is when its over
Three hours is just too long to sit through constant CGI monsters, kids that are always swearing and Bill Haders comic relief that makes you feel like you're watching an SNL skit. I honestly couldn't.t wait for it to end, it was terrible.