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irnbondar
Reviews
Mean Girls (2024)
Horrible songwriting
Songwriting was atrocious. No pacing or rhythm, basic lyrics
I have been to high school plays better than this musical
"Was I a game to you
Was I the way to be cool
Was I the fool"
Or the dramatic belting of "OH ITS FIIIINE
WE'LL BE FIIIINE
WHATEVER FIIIINE" and nothing else
"Cady time to watch your back
Cady time to watch and cough
Because you took me down
But you didn't finish me off"
"I wanna watch the world burn
I got gasoline
And everyone turn mean"
The entire movie doesn't have a color palette, looks like a YouTube video from 2012.
I thought, casting Jenna Fisher as Cady's mom was a really good casting choice. But then Cady and her boy crush Aaron look like siblings, which makes it so creepy, as well as Regina and Janis.
Dancing in a big group to soft Acapella music is so lame.
Barbie (2023)
Not great world building, therefore confusing message
The movie did some real weird worldbuilding where none of the rules were consistent. I had to keep reminding myself that barbieland was made by men, therefore barbieland is not an exact opposite of the real world - it's a rendering of what "men" think female utopia is. But it wasn't a direct opposite of real world either. I doubt many viewers will actually be able to internalize that as part of the lore.
The parallel between realworld and barbieland just didn't make sense therefore it felt like a plot fail. If barbies are all important unlike women in the real world, where does Ken swooning over Barbie land on on that real world spectrum?
Im just going to say, the fact that Barbie has 0 complex feelings until the lady from the real world played with her, but Ken was aware of being unhappy WHILE being not a person but an accessory to Barbie is the kind of double crossing i didn't expect. I was confused about which point it tried proving.
Ryan Gosling has a real chance to become an icon for incels after this performance. He gets rejected, creates an ultramasculine society, and at the end Barbie apologises to him and he rebrands? He was a villain and did not get a redemption arc. He shouldn't even be sentient in this universe as much as he is. I expected Barbie to be honest with him and say she just doesn't love him, or that she wasn't made to have those feelings to him because Matell did not give her those feelings. Instead she apologises for not giving him more attention?
Anyways, it wasn't feminist enough for me. It felt like it avoided some major issues of real life (like the phrase "we just learned how to hide it better" that did not get addressed whatsoever). Like, the Barbies now know that women don't have it as great as them in the real world? How does that solve anything?
Maybe i am just reading too deep into a movie with flawed worldbuilding, made for people who don't generally see the gender bias around them?
4 for some funny jokes, but it could be funnier.
Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers (2022)
I hyperventilated while watching
Honestly, I went in with no expectations, just hoping it will be as funny as other things Andy Samberg is in - and oh boy it delivered. I was the target audience for this movie. I am mad I only learned about it mid 2023.
The Chip and Dale and other Disney nostalgia, breaking the forth wall, COUNTLESS references, the uncanny valley, CATS, the ugly sonic and the teeth... I don't know if in 20 years people would understand this movie, but I was thoroughly entertained and I am so grateful for it.
I also respect the movie starting and giving 0 explanation to why the world is full of cartoon characters.
Moyi dumky tykhi (2019)
Watched at a group screening and the vibes were 👌
I watched this movie twice - once in Ukraine, at a group screening - the director provided the film to us upon request - and we all had a blast. The second time I watched it in the US with my American partner.
This movie has a lot of really awesome cultural jokes that hit home in the right context, but some of the jokes needed explanation for an American viewer. But I appreciate that - I admire the director making movies for Ukrainians, and not for some imaginary audience. Moyi Dumky came out very authentic and real - I felt like the characters were written off my family members and our strained but loving relationships.
The movie was shot beautifully, if anything you will find yourself aesthetically pleased.
The Witcher (2019)
Couldn't finish season 2
It just keeps getting worse.
Somehow, while Netflix is famous for diversifying their cast, they managed to erase the whole culture the original story was based in, its mythology, its look and its sound, by making a bland western product set in medieval times. Whatever bits of mystical creatures we have gotten - it felt like the showrunners went to Simple English article on Wikipedia and wrote based on that, rather than use a perfectly authentical piece of literature that they are so eager to criticize. Instead, they could hire a research team, who could make a huge impact on how to incorporate Polish/eastern European folk elements into show design. I can't emphasize enough how painful it is to watch something so devoid of character, that was written into the fabric of the story. I was looking forward to something new and engaging.
Score in s2 is atrocious - it felt like we were in some cheap hero action movie. I am a huge fan of season 1 soundtrack, I think it added the character to this show that it's now severely lacking.
As for story itself, I can see it being interesting for someone who hasn't read the books, and I can appreciate that, but after s2 I have a feeling that people are encouraged to not read books at all, because why would someone put so much effort into creating a show that is poorly written, when we could have a much more interesting experience when reading. By watching the show people are actively robbing themselves of a better experience. When I re-watched s1 with my partner, cause they were interested, we skipped all but a few Ciri parts, and 0 context were lost.
One of the biggest things that is missing from the context is that the story is set during a race war, and we have yet to see anything other than just casual xenophobia towards Witchers.
Positive things: I love Anya Chalotra as Yennefer, although s2 made her do things extremely out of character. Henry Cavill grew on me pretty quickly, but Geralt sure is lacking the wit and charisma of the original Geralt. Queen Calanthe was cast perfectly. S2 ep1 was the only episode worth watching.
Wednesday (2022)
Painfully uninteresting
I only watched the whole thing because I could not believe that it could be so easy to predict who the villains in the show were from episode 1; I expected for it to be a little more sophisticated.
Wednesday does around and accuses everybody with such passion, that on the last time you just think: again? How many times will she get it wrong and be arrogant enough to ruin all of the friendships that don't even make sense?
Speaking of friendships. The concept of outcasts gets overshadowed by the fact that everybody wants to Wednesday's friend, and she does not mind people breaking her boundaries, despite being famous for having no patience for such thing previously. I liked Jenna as Wednesday, but as a friendship material it is insane to me that everyone just has a double standard for her being toxic and other characters toxicity.
Many of the scenes felt copy-pasted from other movies. The courtyard scene from Mean Girls, multiple visuals exactly from Harry Potter movies. It was really hard to ignore. We're those supposed to be references? Sheer amount makes it feel just lazy.
Acting was supposed to be campy, but is severely lacking, and just makes you feel awkward. It was hard to watch most of the scenes with students, who were overacting anytime there was an emotion involved. So many plot holes in character motivations. Show did not explain many of the core concepts of its world.
Do not recommend.
Andor (2022)
Breath of fresh air in the world of 15second videoclips
Only an overstimulated dopamine addict would call this show boring. After years of disappointment with Star Wars content, Andor has taken a great turn to slowing down the pace and actually elaborating on character development.
It is so extremely satisfying to watch Cassian slowly go through change, while the Rebellion unravels. It is almost painful to watch because so many things echo the real world and its struggles with imperialism, and provides a range of profiles for people capable of rebelling - from different motivations to different upbringings, opportunities and backgrounds. The show echoes the divide between different groups of struggling people and how it only benefits the oppressor, and how every rebellion always pays with blood.
It is always great to see morally gray characters rather than cookie cutter black-and-white good and evil. The show is paced amazingly - letting certain parts simmer in suspense, but also allowing characters make spontaneous decisions that, however, don't feel out of character.
If there are flaws - they are buried under some great writing - I did not encounter any.
Vampire Academy: Darkness (2022)
Badly written show
Julie Plec did the one thing she knows how to do best: bring people back from the dead.
One of the biggest issues people have had with vampire diaries was that no action was non-reversible - anything could be changed by the whims of the writers and characters, pronounced dead 10 times would come back over and over again.
Vampire academy is repeating the same fate. It is extremely disappointing and I felt cheated by this cheap trick - their only way to surprise the viewer, rather spend the last 8 episodes on actual character and story development. This show insults the intelligence of the viewers - even teenagers will see through it the second time it happens. And I guarantee it will happen. I can already predict Michael will come back to be with Sonya, Lissa will start healing strigoi and everyone will live happily ever after until another, more powerful vampire comes along and the story recycles. Lissa seeing the spirit of her brother when he is alive makes me feel uncomfortable from how much they thought "ah, they won't notice"
In addition, motivations of characters are starting to serve the plot holes rather than their own stories, for example Christian, falling for his parent's scheme, Dmitri's affair with tatiana like we are supposed to believe he wouldn't know better, Mia and her ambitions - suddenly going in the background after being so much in the first episodes. Rosa - changing her mind about Lissa after learning that strigoi are after her - if this is the kind of character consistency we are getting by the episode 9 - it is only going downhill from here. It's genuinely a badly written show.
Vampire Academy (2022)
Showrunners will run out of material in about 10 episodes
I have read the books many times and I am here for some changes. But here's the deal for anyone who didn't read the books: get ready to be disappointed soon - the showrunners will run out of material in approximately 10 episodes. They will start coming up with new non sequiturs - and it is not news that when show runners try to write their own stories, it just is never good and reads as fan fiction. Unless you like that sort of writing.
From the very beginning of the show new characters have been introduced one after another. By episode 6 I forgot what was in the episode 3. By episode 7 we are introduced concepts that do not show up until book 5 and it just feels irresponsible to burn through material. The pacing of the show is unbearable. For how many gorgeous sets and costumes they have - they could have at least doubled the show time, instead of fitting the exposition for one story or another in a 5-line dialogue.
Based on the previous things Julie Plec did, I can see that they took the route of explaining everything at once and then having to come up with new stories in the future if the show takes off.
Show runners made some questionable choices by confusing the names of characters, for example queen Tatiana suddenly became queen Marina, but there's now another Tatiana running for the throne. This just feels intentional to anger the og fans.
To address the changes in the character backgrounds - I could care less. I like the cast, I like Rose and Dmitri's chemistry, for most parts.
Big thanks to hair and makeup - I LOVE seeing pores on character's skin. Thoughtful costumes for guards, and the costume department went all out for over the top gowns.
Final thought: looks great, bad pacing.